In Love

Posted: July 6, 2010 in Love
Tags: ,

I never knew that these would come along in the time in which I am already in the process of believing and accepting that fact, the hardcore reality; that I don’t have to be like these anymore. That time is running out for me and If I did not make any wise practical decision, I will no longer be able to get it back to where it should be. I am used to missed calls and unknown numbers in my handheld. But when this one appeared one rainy Friday morning, everything happened too fast that never gave me a chance to counter-react on my usual defensive instinct.

Yes you’re right. Another woman in my life comes into picture. Only this time, I am deeply affected or rather impacted by her presence. I was struck right away in the center of my weakest point, bulls-eye. Damnit! Never been like these before. I’m a cold-blooded Adam, I do not entertain ridiculous feelings of love and fantasies, romance and deep affections. I used to be always in a relationship which I don’t entertain expectations and regards to commitments. My basic simple philosophy is that, people come and go, and so girlfriends too. I managed to be a pro in letting go.

But hey, look at me. I am scared of my own creations. I am falling in love. Not falling, I am already in love. And I am scared to death. Why, I am sure you’re asking me why. Because my simple answer is that I don’t want to fall in love. It’s my one single weakness that until now, I am having hard times figuring it out on how I could possibly recover when everything goes haywire. I can’t imagine the pain of losing someone to another guy. Nor breaking up and letting the one you truly love go.

Call me insane but that is just who I am. No regards to the feeling of others when in a playful relationship but I admit that I am scared to death with the thoughts of falling crazily in love with someone. Not fair ha. Yeah, I am not fair and will not play fair to anyone.

But… This time, let’s see.


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